Sorry About That.

So, yesterday I was in an absolutely horrible mood. We are talking horrid. So bad that I could not even blog. Which is saying something, because I absolutely love to blog. I get made fun of in the house because of my affinity for blogging. Thus, I was in very terrible mood indeed.

Anyway.

I posted some pictures. Just two. From the museum of indigenous art because they were interesting pictures. The funny thing is, though, that neither of the pictures I posted were of indigenous art. They were from the super random modern art exhibit that was on the third floor of the building. They had some very strange things, but some pretty cool things, like the cupcakes in a sheep pen. I really liked that. Because, duh, it's cupcakes and duh, I'm a girl. It's a match made in heaven. So that was cool. The actual indigenous art was pretty interesting too. I went into the museum without the greatest attitude, and I was thinking that I was not going to enjoy it at all, and that it was going to be boring and stupid and lame and whatever. And it was fascinating. But then again I am a huge history nerd and I get sucked in when people of the past are mentioned. There are a few pics on my facebook of some of the artifacts that were left, like a canoe and stone arrowheads and all sorts of things. The thing that I thought was most interesting was the indian tribe that sacrificed people and ate them. Yea. Definitely wrote some facts down about that. Yeah, it's gross. But come on. And it's not like they were cannibals. They did not periodically eat people for nourishment. It was a religious ritual; the leader of the tribe would always pick the enemie's strongest warrior or someone like that, and then they would ceremonially sacrifice him and eat him, in order to internalize the strength he possessed.

Yea. I listened. Yea. I'm a nerd.

I really did enjoy it. I talked with our tour guide, Luis, who several people on the excursion were kind of eyeing. He seemed like a pretty cool guy. We talked in Spanish. He said I was good at it. Win. But he really was informative and nice to us with our questions and everything. Plus it was hotter than the dickens throughout the whole building, so we all were sweating and fanning ourselves with notebooks in the typical tourist fashion. We saw some other Americans, and they started speaking English and I almost cried with joy. It is so wonderful to hear someone else speak English other than the people that I am with constantly. It was rather glorious, but they were leaving. Sad. Then some people from the group and I ended up at a café down the street, where I got a Cortado. Which is just coffee and milk, but it is like a work of art. And it is sooo delicious. They are a bit expensive, but oh well. I get them whenever I go to a café and try and act all cool. I got a killer picture out of it, i.e. my facebook profile and the picture on the right. So that was epic.

Day 2 out of 2 that murders my self-esteem. My first class was actually pretty good, thought I feel confused a lot, and we tend to get off topic more often than not. We ended up on conspiracy theories for about 10 hours before we got back on track. And those conspiracies really make me think. I mean, I don't automatically buy into a lot of them, but it makes me step back and question how great America is. It makes me step back and question the decisions that were made regarding war and treatment of other countries and terrorism and all of that. It's sort of painful to come to the realization that there are things wrong with the country. And I think that I am a bit slow on the draw regarding this realization, but I guess I've know for a while, I have just been denying it. And it is painful to realize that as a US citizen, I am going to have to come to terms with if I think that things that have happened are ok. And if not, then what? What do I do? This world is not is not a simple as people make it out to be. There is entirely too much to be thought through, and honestly, I am afraid to do it. I might realize that there are beliefs I have held onto for so long that I might have to give up because I don't see that they are right anymore. Or just be sad that I have to lose the Pollyanna factor in how I see a lot of the world. But I don't have to, necessarily. I could just choose to ignore it, and live as I always have, taking things at face value and not looking into them and thinking them through, which is a lot easier, or wrestle with a lot of the things that I have been learning about as of late. I don't know what it's gonna be. And that is scary too.

The seconds part of the day was truly dedicated to murdering my self-esteem. I am hating Spanish as of right now. A lot. I cannot understand it. And everyone speaks it. And I spend about 13 hours a week sitting in a class thinking 'I have taken Spanish for 8 years and this is the culmination. THIS is the culmination?!?!' I get so frustrated. At this class at University makes me nutsss. First, it's hot and I spend about and hour of it trying not to faint from heat exhaustion. Secondly, I don't know what is going on. She talked for an hour and I had a vague idea of what was happening. Third, there was a baby spider on my desk, and, because I have an affinity for spiders, I spend about 15 minutes watching him. He was a very comical spider. Fourth, our teacher is probably the worst teacher I have ever had in regards to writing notes on the board. She will write a few points, and then draw arrows and add 13 things to the list, and then add more around it. My notes look like a Pollack on a bad day. Sooo that is how things are going on the Spanish front. My roomate and I decided that we were going to have good attitudes, irrespective of how hard it is right now, it's going to get better, and we will understand everything in a few weeks. So, good attitude it is.

Another thing. Paper can work as an eraser. Fact.

I recently have been obsessed with the poet Rilke. Which is funny, considering I am in Latin American and there a lot of great poets down here. So that's funny.

Carnaval tonight! Look for pictures!
:)